What drives your decisions? Have you even thought about it?
Do you make your decisions based upon what is expected of you? What happens if someone is not happy with your decision? What about if one person or another is disappointed no matter which way you decide? How about fear? Does fear drive some of your decisions, either to avoid the feared situation, confront the feared situation, or to prove something to yourself or someone else?
Recently, I had to make a decision in which I was pulled in many directions by a number of considerations. Fear was a big driver for me. How do I clear away my fear to make a sound decision? Not wanting to disappoint or hurt people I deeply love and care about. I can’t make everyone happy. Deep soul searching, seeking the “right” answer. There is no “right” answer and there is no “wrong” answer. It’s a choice, yes or no. I imagine yes and can feel the rightness of it, so I make a solid decision, I choose yes! . . . . Tightness grips me with complications. I imagine no and can feel the rightness of it, so I make a solid decision, I choose no! . . . . Darkness of lost opportunity and disappointment swells inside me. I ride the teeter totter up and down, yes and no, over and over and over again.
How to clear away my internal junk to gain clarity? What does life become if decisions and choices are based on making others happy? It’s so easy to obliterate our Self in the service of making others happy, in the service of trying to be perfect, which of course, we can’t.
Prayers in the shower seems to lead me to my moments of clarity. Simple, heartfelt, prayer, then quiet openness. The answer whispered its way into my being. Peace, unshifting, solid feeling of peaceful rightness shining clarity in my heart. With integrity, communicating the answer that brings disappointment . . . to myself and to others . . . KNOWing the rightness of my answer . . . . to live in peaceful authenticity.
BE TRUE TO YOURSELF!